My Soft Opening: Transcript
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Thursday, February 15, 2018
By Little Miss Addict
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Welcome to the Little Miss Addict Podcast your source for all things addictive. My name is Frankie I'm an addict and your host. 

This isn’t some crazy podcast that’s going to highlight bloody gory drug stories and I’m not an evangelist that’s going to tell anyone to quit doing drugs… if I wasn’t an addict, I’d be doing drugs too. And unfortunately I’m not going to save your family members from active addiction….I’ve tried saving mine and I’m really really really bad at it. None of those fuckers have listened… What you will find here is an exploration of the obsessive mind, addiction and recovery through comedic storytelling and insightful interviews. 

In the coming weeks/months/years I will be talking to recovering addicts alcoholics Overeaters under eaters food addicts sex addicts love addicts anorexics debtors underearners compulsive clutterers co-dependents and the people that come from them, love them, study them, and intentionally seek to create them. Some of these interviews will be with addicts that you know and love, other interviews will be with people you’ve never heard of, some will be conducted completely anonymously, and you will even hear from professionals that study this shit.  

A little bit about me- My name is Frankie, I am a badass photographer and writer. I live in Los Angeles with my junkie husband who is also in recovery and a badass writer, and our 2 year old son who loves yelling FUCK when he’s super sleepy and our dogs who are being exceptionally helpful and quiet right now. 

And I LOVE addicts. If I had a target market it would be “people who are set to self-destruct”. The people are told not to push the red button but just can’t not push the red button once they’ve been told not to, Those. Are. my. People. And it makes sense- I’m like a 4th generation addict. It’s really a miracle I’m even here considering you know, how haphazard addicts are, but my parents grandparents, great grandparents, aunts uncles and cousins all seem to have this thing in some form. Whether that's food addiction or sex addiction, extreme religiosity, codependency or your garden variety drunk or drug addict. Someone in my family has it. 

Mmm… I should be clear that I was adopted at 13 years old and my adopted family is not riddled with addiction. If you know them, it’s not like just like really good at hiding their track marks. They are like, pretty normal people. 

Regardless, my whole life, even as a kid, I found the other people who were like me, who came from families like mine, and reacted to the world in the same ways that I did. 
It’s as if I have this magnet inside of me that pulls me to addicts... And  artists... and crazy people, And pulls us toward comically ridiculous siturations. And TBH I love it.I don’t believe addiction is a death sentence, I mean yes it’s super shitty if you can’t get a grasp on it, but the obsessive mind is actually an incredible tool. 

Addicts are some of the most brilliant, ambitious, talented, wreckless, entertaining individuals. They aren’t just the people you see on the street. They are your doctors, professors, teachers, nurses, artists, musicians, writers, scientists, therapists, and idols. And if addicts can learn to stop spinning towards destruction and they can do incredible shit. 

THAT is what this podcast is about. How to harness your habits and contain your crazy.

How to savor self control and allow a little breath of space between your thoughts and actions. It’s an inside look at how insane people become sane.

This my love letter to addiction.

Now if you follow me, you’ve seen me posting about this podcast since for about 2… 3 months. I did my first interview months ago and it was rad, 

Then I realized I should have some episodes backlogged so I could you know, release them to you all with the consistency of  like a super reliable person. … I didn’t want to half ass this and have an episode come out one week, then 3 weeks later, then 2 weeks later etc. SO I started to send out interview requests But as I was typing up my first draft the email was getting a bit long winded... which didn’t make me sound the most … grounded… so I decided to make a website so the people I wanted to interview could see that this was a legit podcast with a clear vision and not just the fleeting whim of a creepy addict trying to stalk them. 

SO I spent a few weeks working on Little Miss  It is rad and check it out. On there you will find a list of Dream Addict Interviews - I’m not saying these people are for sure addicts but I asked you guys what addicts you wanted to hear from and these are the people you said so It’s on you. You guys called broke their anonymity, not me. 

THere is also an About page so people will know who the heck I am and that I’m not a crazy person, I mean... I AM...  but I’m a crazy person with a plan who has done some pretty cool shit, 

There is also a find a meeting page with links to every legit 12-step fellowship …. that is all inclusive and not secretly tied to a cult or treatment center), and there is a Book shelf where you can find links to memoirs, recovery literature, and other self-helpy writings.

So I’ve got the website up and I’m researching podcast hosting and I’m making my cover art options (which if you voted on, thank you) We’ve obvioulsy gone with D… I LOVE D and other stories of wonderful compulsions… 

and I then start calculating how much it’s all going to cost, and YES, I can totally make it a vanity project that I just pay for but I thought maybe it could be self-supporting. So I began a Patreon.

I’m not saying that I have a problem with focus, but I’m also not saying that I don’t.

Patreon is basically a way for people to subscribe to my creative projects and in return they get rewards like special postcards in the mail with terrible life advice etc.

So I’ve got the website up, I’ve got the patreon up, and I’m sending out interview requests and I’m getting great responses and then I get a cold. 

I’ve actually had a cold for almost a month and it’s not like an awful cold I can still function, it’s just like a never ending river of green snot that makes me feel like I’m probably not in the best shape to invite people over so I can slime them. 

Regardless, I can do skype interviews. So I test drive the skype record app to make sure I know how to use it. And am not going to accidently delete all the files and I schedule interviews with rad addicts in the UK and and San Francisco and australia.

Then like 2 weeks ago I realized I needed podcast music, so... being an overly confident human being who isn’t great at asking for help, I borrowed a xylophone from a neighbor baby attempted to tinker out a sweet intro. 

It’s took me only about 5… 8 days to remember, for the millionth time, that I am not, actually, musician. So I reached out to a talented musician friend and asked if he could come up with a 10 second intro and that if podcast had a spirit animal it would be the seaguls from Finding Nemo but instead of saying Mine Mine Mine they would be flamboyant pink flamingos and they would be saying More More More and could he help with some music that would channel that image. I didn’t want any dark, heavy, addicty massive attack Nine Inch Nails fuck music, something a bit fun and light.  

SO that brings us to today. I’m waiting on that music which is why you’re not hearing it already

Now here’s where I break your hearts a little bit. You guys. This isn’t a real episode. This is my test run. It’s my how - do - i use lybsin and get my podcast on itunes episode. It’s like my soft opening. Which sounds... really. weird. Originally i was going to just say HI! And see if I could get that up but instead I decided I’d take the opportunity to introduce myself and what this whole project is.

The real first episode of the Little Miss Addict podcast is Launching Thursday March 1st. Thursday thursday thursday.

In the meantime you can send me stories of your bottoms, spiritual epiphanies, any amends you can’t make because of that little caveat, or if you have questions about addiction or problems that you want fixed, I can’t fix them for you but I can share them - anonymously - with a community of addicts and we can all just give it a go and see what terrible solutions we come up with. 

For Now - go check out Little MIss follow me on all the social media - links in the description of this episode, you can email me at 

and submit info to me about how your life solutions and please rate this podcast, pass it on to anyone you know who you will love it, and subscribe so that I can, i don’t know, win the podcast race or something. 

In closing, remember, if it’s after 10pm and it sounds like a good idea - don’t do it.


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